I had a good friend; his name was Sam. I just found out yesterday that he had passed away, on October 18, 2019. I had gotten back from a trip and found his Christmas card, returned by the post office. I had hoped there was some other explanation, but no. I see that a memorial service was held for him on December 21, 2020 (the anniversary of my father’s death, in 1996). My condolences go to his family and many friends.
It was 1997, I think, when I first met Sam, at a friend’s Sunday School Christmas party. Our mutual friend played a recording of Sam’s wonderful children’s story, narrated by his friend, the late Walter Dixon, a celebrated Rochester radio personality for many years (For more on Walter Dixon, see http://www.walterdixon.com).
Sam took the photograph you see of me at this website. It is the same one that is on the back cover of my book, Francis Bacon’s Hidden Hand. He was an excellent photographer. He has taken many memorable photographs, including a fabulous one of a referee knocked out cold at a wrestling match.
While attending Monroe Community College in Rochester, New York, Sam had been editor of its literary journal. Under his tutelage, the journal won an award, and the journal’s entire staff was treated to a trip to New York City. One of Sam’s ideas expressed in that journal later showed up in a big company’s national advertising campaign.
I believe Sam had an English degree was from Nazareth College and that he needed only to finish his student teaching to have his teaching certification and master’s degree in education from Nazareth. One of his professors there at Nazareth had encouraged him to enroll in a Ph.D. program at St. Bonadventure. I could see Sam as a pipe-smoking English professor in a tweed jacket.
Sam also had a keen interest in science, especially in Einstein’s theory of relativity. He was an original thinker who was always coming up with a new idea that just might work, like shoes with interchangeable heels so you could adjust the height. He loved William Butler Yeats and Alexandr Solzenicyn, author of the Gulag Archipelago. He made people laugh with his voice impersonations that were spot-on. He created some memorable paintings.
Sam was smart, talented, and kind. There was just one thing that held Sam back: he struggled with severe obsessive-compulsive disorder.
He would not want us to slide over this fact. He was a strong advocate for the mentally ill; for erasing the stigma of treatment. In fact, one of the accomplishments of which he was most proud was that, several years back, he was the instigator and perhaps main organizer of a conference hosted by New Hope Methodist Church in Rochester, New York. This conference sought to bring together a coalition of interested professionals and other persons, united by a purpose of improving the lives of mentally ill persons. It was a good idea and a lot of work, as anyone who has ever organized a conference knows.
Sam did a fabulous job. Speakers included his own psychiatrist; a newly-graduated mental health professional whom Sam had kindly befriended when she, as a graduate student new to town, had started attending his church; local representatives of various mental health organizations; the eloquent wife of a person Sam knew who was suffering from schizophrenia; and Sam himself as a keynote speaker.
Many agreed the conference and coalition were a good idea; in fact, Sam was quite disappointed that it was only to be a one-time event. Perhaps someone else will pick up the ball on this event.
Sam cared about his human friends, and he loved his cats, Benjamin (the main character in his children’s book), Benther I, and Benther II. I remember him gently removing Benjamin from the sheer curtains he was destroying. Benther (#I) had learned to open the door of the refrigerator. The vet had ordered that he be put on a diet, and he was constantly hungry. Turned out, Benther had diabetes. Sam lovingly fed him a special diet, though it was expensive. Then there was Benther (#II), a former street-fighter, I’d always imagined.
Like others, perhaps, I wish I had made more time for Sam. I was going to, if there had turned out to be a less painful explanation for the non-deliverable Christmas card. Sam had been a good friend to me, especially when I was going through a rough time a few years back. Despite the mental torture of his intrusive thoughts–made more bearable by medications but never totally absent–he took the time to listen and encourage others.
He often expressed his wish that more church folk would occasionally invite him over after church for Sunday dinner. Sundays and holidays can be especially lonely for singles. Why don’t we invite someone over soon, in remembrance of Sam?
The obituary with posted condolences are at https://rochestercremation.com/obituary/samuel-benick#comment-305189. If anyone else wants to write about Sam or share photographs here at my blog, would you please be in touch. Or, feel free to share the link where you post them.
Sam’s legacy is love, compassion, and caring. He wanted to make a difference in the world, and he did. Let’s carry on his legacy!
